


A Chance To Start Anew

by RoamingHalla



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Alternate Ending, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fix-It of Sorts, Gen, So That's What This Is, Suicidal Thoughts, i also just really wanted them to live, i just had a lot of thoughts about them by the end of season 1
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:21:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25817236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoamingHalla/pseuds/RoamingHalla
Summary: What if Tarrlok made the decision to stay alive? What if the brothers got a chance to start a new life, to runaway together like Noatok had always wanted?
Comments: 1
Kudos: 29





	A Chance To Start Anew

**Author's Note:**

> this is made because i thought the potentional of them living and healing from their trauma was better than them dying. also because i found myself suddenly caring about Tarrlok a lot after one episode.

Shifting through the waves of the ocean was a silver boat, it moved through the water rapidly, it was designed for speed. It was a small, enough for only a handful of people but for two people, it was more than enough. Above, the sun was starting to set, it was almost a perfect metaphor, Tarrlok thought, the sun on whole life had set

It had been ripped away from him, though, he knew the blame landed solely on his own feet. He had been exposed for capturing the Avatar, she had gotten away, which now he knew was a good thing, but it had not been without cost, his reputation was ruined, that was why he left, or at least that would be the public story. But the truth, the truth would have been worse, he could deal with the consequences for his choice, but if it had gotten out that he had left the city with Amon, the former leader of the Equalists, he would have to live in a city where, nearly everyone in the city saw the man, his _brother_ as a terrorist or as a man who had lied to them, and that was a fate Tarrlok could never live with.

But despite knowing this was his best option, he could not shake to feeling that this was wrong, that it wrong to be leaving the city. Perhaps because he had not stepped a single foot outside of Republic City since he arrived decades ago, out of some sheer sense of duty to his new home. And now, after he had spent over a so many years there, he was now leaving it, _permanently_ he added.

Sighing, he looked behind him, the city was vanishing from view, and within a few seconds he watched as the home he had known for years disappear, and he would never set foot back in it, and he felt as if he had been stabbed in his gut, he had lost _everything._

Then, as he focused back on the waters ahead of them, he saw his brother look back, and smile at him on cue, as if to remind him, that he had not lost everything. He then looked forward again, he had to focus on driving the boat.

_"_ The two of us together again, there's nothing we cannot do." His voice was happy, no, _enthusiastic,_ and Tarrlok flinched, he was _happy_. 

He could not recall a moment where he was happy, perhaps when they were younger, before there childhood had been stolen from them, but those days were foggy, he could barely even remember they existed. He had lost hope long ago to ever see his brother smile, and here he was, happy for the first time in _ever,_ and he knew he should share it, here he was with his brother, a redo, a chance to start over, but something else emerged.

_Jealously._

It was a bitter, ugly feeling, that wrapped around his mind, smothering any other more sensible emotion. He was happy despite the fact that they had lost everything, Tarrlok even worse so, his own bending had been taken by the ends of Naotok himself, a violation of his body so person done by his own brother, and it was even worse that moment had been the moment where he had found out his own brother had survived running away all those years ago in the Northern Water Tribe. It was all a cruel, depressing outcome.

And yet, there was a small victory in that day, he could never blood bend again. 

But, despite that one small gift of being free of his own wicked bending, he still had nothing, _they_ had nothing, and yet despite that, no, because of that, his brother was happy, after all, it was why they were riding this boat together. He knew, somewhere deep in his mind, that despite it all, this was a good outcome, but the bitterness he felt held much more power than that.

"Yes, Noatak." His voice was harsh, harsher than it should have been, given that he would have done anything to join his brother, to fix that mistake, he knew that; yet he could not deny that when he had spoken with such a gentle, cheerful voice, a dagger had pierced his heart.

He spoke again, "Hmph-" Noatak words were halted by a laugh, a chuckle to be exact, it was quiet one that vanished as it had appeared, but it was there, and he smiled again, as he did, he felt the knife twist in his stomach again, and he concluded he couldn't see his happiness on his face without that feeling worsening.

So, Tarrlok looked away from him, and he noticed the stash of gloves in the side of the boat, which meant that the boat Noatok had confiscated was an Equalist one.

"I had almost forgotten the sound of my own name." Noatok spoke those words softly, it was as if he had only made that conclusion that he was free from his old title just now. He could finally be himself again, and that was a good thing, he had another chance to live, and no one would know of who he had been for all those years in Republic City, he had a path laid out for him.

But Tarrlok knew he did not, his name was not something he could have run away from, he had been such an important figure in the politics of Republic City and it could easily follow him wherever he went. It was a painful reality, that the fact that he had spent all those years working for the City, building a name of his own, had vanished in a moment, he even _deserved_ it. He had done the one thing he had vowed to never do, he had used the wicked bending he had been forced to learn on someone, on the _Avatar_ of all people _._ And for what? It had all been for nought

His whole life there had been for nothing, and it was worse to know that everything he had done had been living up to his father's legacy he had tried so hard to escape.

That thought alone sent cold shivers down his body, his face twitched and he could feel a broken sob form in the back of his throat, it was one he could barley repress.

His whole life was never his, he was just a puppet to his father, even when he adamantly thought he was defying him, and all Tarrlok could think was that even if he made amends with his brother like he always wanted, he could not escape his father, he would forever be following his wicked legacy, he would always be a puppet to him even though he was no longer alive.

And, he realized only one thing could break that chain, there was a single thing he could do that would be his own, if he took his life, that choice would truly be his own, and he would also be free from the ghost that haunted him, that controlled him.

He looked back at his brother, and he quickly grabbed one of the gloves without him noticing. He waited a few seconds to put it on, a few seconds to change his mind, a voice saying he had reasons to not do it.

No voice came.

Looking over to his right, he spotted the fuel tank was only within an arms reached, _that_ would do, with a simple bolt of electricity sent through it, he could escape from his fathers clutches was right there. Taking in a breath, he unscrewed the lid, and in that moment he wondered if his brother even knew what he was about to do, but he hoped he did not, he wanted his brother to be happy without it being tainted, he was owed that much.

Placing his hand over it, he looked up at Noatok, and he spoke, "It will be just like the good old days."

Before he moved his hand, he saw his brother cry, it was just a single tear, but he saw it, and that caused him to freeze, his hand hovering barely above near death.

"What am I doing?" He whispered out loud to himself, if he spoke his words, they held more power over him. And as he thought on that question, he moved his hand back into his lap.

And it was true, what was he doing? He may not see a life free of his father's clutches, of the puppet-master of his life, and he saw the only way to be rid of it was to end his life, and he was fine with that, but his brother had not consented, how could he do that act if it meant robbing Noatok of the life he so clearly wanted.

He was happy, he had just cried for the first time he had ever seen, and it was not out of sadness, nor anger, but glee. He wanted to have that life back, the one their father had robbed them of, and how did he have any right to take it.

Noatok looked back, he had heard his question, evident by how he had raised a single brow, "Are you alright?" His voice was flooded with concern, when he spoke, and it washed over Tarrlok and drowned everything else.

His brother cared.

That was all he had ever wanted, to be with his brother again, to see him be that caring, young child he had been once, and maybe, maybe that's what stopped him. He may not see a way to live without his father controlling it, and he did not care about his life, not in the moment, but he could stay alive for his brother, maybe for now, that was all that mattered.

As he opened his mouth to speak, the words did not come out, instead, the sob he held back earlier had broken through. On cue, he put his head in his hands, a way to hide his sudden outburst, it was instinct, he had done it without thinking. Normally he tried to stop himself from outbursts of emotion, it was pathetic to display such clear signs of weakness infront of others, he could not show weakness in his job, but then, he it struck him, that was his _former_ job, he no longer needed to hid his feelings least he wanted to hear about his outburst somewhere on the news, but here, here he was free to cry, to sob, to show weakness. And as he sat there, crying, he felt his muscles loosen for the first time in years, the weight he carried finally lessened.

"Tarrlok!" Noato's voice was loud, and he raced over towards him. Stopping, he lowered himself so that he rested on one knee, and for a few seconds, he looked up at him, as if he was considering what to do, he figured Amon rarely had moments like this one. He then placed a hand on his shoulder, a comforting gesture, "We'll be okay, I promise you that, I will do everything in my power to ensure that the two of us can finally have that life our father stole from us." His voice was quiet, it was soft and so unlike the commanding voice of Amon he had only days ago

Tarrlok took a deep breath, and he exhaled, he did this again and again as he tried to form some sort of control. Moving his head out of his hands, he met his brother eyes, and he spoke. "I would like that."

As he finished the control he had mustered to speak had weakened and he cried again. Suddenly, he felt his brother's arms wrap around him, it was tight, and he blinked, his brother had never hugged him.

Maybe he was right, he did not believe it for himself yet, but if he could witness Noatok smile, if he could see him be happy, if his brother could hug him, after his whole life spent being cold and distant, then maybe, someday in the far, far future, Tarrlok could be okay. 

He hugged his brother back, and for almost a minute they stayed there, simply hugging, and it was the happiest moment in his life, it was almost sad to admit, but it was the truth, "I'm glad that we have this chance, to be together again." His words were muffled both through tears and his brother's shoulder, but he knew he could hear them. 

"I am too." Then, as he let the words rest in the air for a few moments, he stepped away, and he offered Tarrlok a hand, to help him up, "Perhaps you could take over the rest of the drive?" He asked, Tarrlok did not know why, but he didn't question it.

He grabbed his hand, and as he got to his feet he began to walk over to the front of the boat to take over driving. Stopping infront of the wheel, he looked back at Noatok, "Where should we go? We have everywhere in the world to start anew"

His brother tilted his head ever so slightly, as if he had not considered the question earlier, "Anywhere, I do not care where it is, it matters we are together." 

_That was true_ , he thought.

He knew he was not ready to return to a life in a quiet village, he needed a city, he needed something busy and alive to distract him, and he simply was not used to a quiet life like he once had, and he also knew his brother could do with a place where he could do good, he had not told him that, but he knew his brother, in his new chance on life, would want to try and fight against inequality in earnest.

And one place came to mind that filled both requirements, "Ba Sing Se it is." He watched his brother for some sort of sign that he was against his decision, but he got none.

As he took the wheel, he watched as the sun set, it was now hidden under the ocean waves, and the sky had begun to turn dark, it would be night soon. It was a beautiful sight, the way to ocean looked at this time of day, at _any_ time of day, was sure to be a wondrous sight. But to Tarrlok, it was more than that.

It was a sign. His old life was now truly behind him, and maybe, that was a good thing, for his brother it was another chance, a restart on life he deserved; that he was sure of, and maybe, as time extended itself, it could prove the same for himself. 

For now, he was with staying alive for Noatok, for his brother to have the chance of a life that had been wrongfully taken from him, and that, was good enough for him.

**Author's Note:**

> this will probably be my first of many fics with these two, i hope it will be because I have a lot of feelings about them. Also this is my first fic with just canon characters so I hope its good


End file.
